Convince Me (Holton Series #1) Page 13

  He reached for her hand. Surprised, she looked at him. Steven drove on silently for a moment and then simply said, "Then, come home."

  It no longer mattered if she had a job or a place to live. All Steven wanted was to wipe that sad look from her face and if moving back home would do it then Steven would lend his support.

  Victoria flashed him a grin and gave his hand a quick squeeze. She turned back to Mitch who was still shaking his head. He still wasn't convinced.

  "I still think you're nuts, but do what makes you happy, kid," he said. As always, Mitch supported her decision even if he disagreed with it. That was something that Steven had never been able to do. He knew that for that reason Mitch and Victoria were closer to each other in many ways than they were to him.

  The rest of the drive to the airport was uneventful. Victoria left in a whirlwind of emotion and energy and Steven was suddenly very glad she was going to be moving home. Life was always more enjoyable when she was around. A little more stressful maybe but definitely more enjoyable. He had missed her a great deal.

  He and Mitch completed the return trip in companionable conversation. They talked leisurely about Mitch's latest assignment and Steven's work. They discussed Victoria. Her plans to move back to Holton still worried Steven but he wanted her to be happy. He just wasn't sure the move was in her best interest professionally. It appeared Mitch shared his concerns but Mitch was more worried about Victoria's reasons, which she had left unexpressed. As they had never been able to second-guess their sister, the conversation soon became general. It wasn't until they had returned home that Mitch brought up the subject of Anna.

  "I like Anna," Mitch said when they had returned to the house. They were sitting in Steven's kitchen eating a late lunch.

  "I like her too," Steven said with a smile.

  Mitch nodded slowly. "She has a problem, you know."

  "I know," Steven answered, not at all surprised Mitch had noticed. His brother was very good at reading people. He was well respected as an investigative reporter. He had earned that respect by being resourceful and intuitive. Mitch had spent his life watching people and he was very good at it.

  "She is worried about being black," Steven told him. "She doesn't talk about it much but I think her mother was treated pretty poorly by her father's family and she is afraid that the same thing will happen to her."

  There was a short pause as Mitch went to the refrigerator for another coke. When he returned, he looked out the window before turning back to Steven. Looking his brother directly in the eyes, Mitch said, "That is not what I meant."

  Alarmed at his serious tone, Steven demanded, "Then what did you mean?"

  "Anna may have a problem with her race, although it didn't show last night, but her fears go far deeper than that."

  "Mitch, what are you talking about?"

  "I think Anna shows the signs of someone with a very unpleasant past. An unpleasant past that has nothing to do with her race. "

  Steven stared at his brother trying to comprehend what he was saying. He didn't question Mitch's assumption. Mitch was not the most reliable person in the world but Steven valued his opinion when it came to understanding people. He had always been better at reading between the lines.

  One of the reasons Steven's partnership with Andrew worked so well was that Andrew also knew how to read people. If the answer could be found on paper, Steven would find it but when it came to dealing with humans face to face, he often fell short.

  "What kind of signs?" he asked his brother now.

  "Her quiet manner seems to be some sort of protective instinct. For example, at the party, she only spoke with a select few people and never joined in a conversation in a large group. Yet, after most of the guests left and it was just the family, she talked quite freely and seemed very relaxed."

  Steven shook his head. "Mitch, you are making too much of this. She is just shy."

  "Maybe," Mitch responded, "but her refusal to talk about her parents, especially her father, is something to consider."

  "My god, Mitch, what did you do? Question her?"

  "Of course, I questioned her," Mitch said in an exasperated tone. "That is what I do. I question people. Look, Steve, I'm not saying that Anna has some deep dark secret that needs to be exposed. All I'm saying is that, in my opinion, there is something in her past that still haunts her and you better deal with it."

  Thoughts of Anna rushed through Steven's mind and he decided his brother might be right. He had known all along that something was keeping Anna from making a commitment. He had assumed it was her race but now Steven thought it might be something far more serious. He began to wonder exactly what her father had done to her.

  Mitch rose from the table and slapped Steven on the back. "I'm going to say goodbye to the folks and then head out. I have to be in Washington D. C. by Monday and I have a few stops to make on the way. I'll call you in a few days."

  "Okay," Steven said as his brother walked to the door. "Hey, thanks Mitch."

  His brother raised his hand in acknowledgement as he headed out the door. A few minutes later Steven heard Mitch's motorcycle and knew his brother was gone. As silence descended on his house, Steven thought about all he had learned today.

  Discovering that Victoria was not as happy as she had always seemed troubled Steven. It made him wonder how much he had missed when it came to his sister. He hoped that if she did return to Holton it would make her happy.

  And then there was Anna. If what Mitch had said was true, then Steven had a much bigger problem than he had believed. He had to earn her trust. He knew that would be the only way to reach her.

  The next few weeks went smoothly and Steven began to relax. Anna showed no signs of retreating and was now quite open about their relationship so he put aside his concerns. She had joined Steven at his parents for dinner on their Monday night ritual. Steven was growing so confident in their relationship that he purchased an engagement ring. Now all he needed was the right time to ask her.

  Chapter 10

  The firemen had long gone and Steven stared at her a moment before stalking to the door and slamming it behind him. Anna sank to the couch and burst into tears. All her hopes and dreams had gone up in flames just as her carefully prepared meal had earlier. Anna cried for all the things she had missed. She cried for her mother and for the life her mother had known and the influence it still had on her own. Anna cried until there were no tears left and then she rose slowly from the couch and walked back into the kitchen.

  She glanced around in disgust. Everything was a mess. The counters and cabinets were still wet and the roast, which was the first thing that had caught on fire, was a shriveled mass in the sink. Her dinning table was littered with debris and the smell of stale smoke still lingered in the room.

  Anna walked over to the small window and opened it letting the cool night air flow through the apartment. She returned to the counter and began putting the dishes away. She threw the roast into the trash then she grabbed several towels and started wiping up the water all the while trying to keep her tears at bay. She let her mind wonder back to earlier events.

  It had started out a perfect day. She and Steven had been getting along very well. Her friendships with Julie and Rachel were growing deeper with each passing day and she was beginning to feel like she was part of the community. Anna had decided to repay all the kindness from her friends by having her first dinner party.

  It was the second weekend in March and the weather was beautiful. The sun had been shinning and there was no hint of rain. Anna had risen early to clean the apartment and plan her meal. Everything had gone perfectly until her guests arrived.

  Steven was the first to come and he brought a wonderful red wine that would go beautifully with the roast. "I thought this might help settle your nerves," he said with a smile.

  Anna laughed. She had been nervous all week and Steven had teased her about it. She knew she was over-reacting but she wanted it to be a perfect evening.

/>   "What can I do to help?" Steven asked and Anna put him to work making the salad. They worked side by side in quiet conversation and Anna began to relax.

  Julie and Nick were the next to arrive followed closely by Andrew and then Rachel. They all gathered in the living room and the conversation flowed. All her guests were comfortable with each other and they enjoyed being together.

  As Anna went to check on the meat, she noticed a slight burning smell. Rushing into the kitchen, she opened the oven just in time to see the roast go up in flames. Reacting instinctively, Anna reached for a nearby towel and pulled the pan from the oven. Dumping the meat into the sink, she then threw the towel onto the windowsill to her left and the pan onto the floor. The beef was still on fire so she quickly turned on the water to put out the flames.

  All the commotion brought the others into the room. Anna turned to see their shocked faces as they stared at her. Trying to stay calm, she manufactured a smile in spite of the fear pounding through her. It was her worst nightmare. Mentally she was replaying the fire that killed her father when Rachel pointed behind her and shouted, "Anna, be careful."

  Anna turned to see the towel she had used to pull the pan from the oven had also caught on fire and had now spread it to the curtains above the windowsill. In shock, Anna was unable to move as she stood staring at the flames as they continued to spread. The smoke was now strong enough to set off the smoke alarm and the noise was deafening.

  "Anna," Steven called as he rushed over to her. Pulling her to the side, he yelled over the clamor, "Anna, where is your fire extinguisher?"

  Still in shock, Anna was only able to point to the pantry. She watched, unable to move as Steven charged over to the pantry and pulled the extinguisher from inside. Andrew had also entered the kitchen and was busily trying to beat out the fire with a wet towel. The fire was spreading quickly and Anna felt someone behind her pulling her from the room. She turned to see Nick and Julie pushing her into the living room. She tried to resist but her legs would no longer hold her so Anna sank into the nearest chair. In the distance she heard the wailing of a fire engine.

  "It's okay, Anna." She felt Rachel's arm slip around her shoulder. "The fire department is on the way. Nick called 911. They will put it out. Just try to relax."

  It was then that Anna realized she was shaking. Unable to stop, she rose quickly from the chair and walked back toward the kitchen. She felt Rachel grab her from behind. "No, Anna, wait."

  There was suddenly a pounding on the door and Rachel let her go long enough to answer the door. Anna replayed the events of her youth. Her father yelling at her, telling her she was reckless and irresponsible before rushing back into the house. Anna had tried to stop him but he had been so intoxicated that he had thought he was invincible. They later told her it wasn't her fault. There was no way that she had been the cause of the fire but Anna had never been able to rid herself of the guilt.

  The firemen hurried into the kitchen and Steven and Andrew quickly moved out of the way. It took only a few minutes for the men to get the fire under control and soon everything was settled. They asked Anna a few questions, which she answered as best she could and one of them checked the oven and found a faulty wire.

  Anna was relieved to know that she was not at fault but she couldn't help the fear that still gripped her. The firemen left soon after and Nick offered to go get them all some food while the others began to start cleaning up Anna's kitchen. This finally snapped Anna out of her trance.

  "Thanks, Nick" she said with a tight smile, "but don't bother. Look, everyone, don't worry about the kitchen. It's been a long evening. Why don't we call it a night? I will clean things up later."

  "Don't be silly, Anna," Julie said. "We can all help and it will only take a few minutes."

  "No!" Anna snapped. "Just leave it!"

  "We can have this place cleaned up in no time, Anna," Andrew stated, supporting his sister. "Don't worry, we'll have everything back to normal in a jiffy."

  "I said I didn't want your help," Anna yelled. Her fear had made her angry. She couldn't control the words.

  No one said a word. They all just watched her silently. Knowing she had been rude, Anna tried to smile. "Please, just leave it."

  Some of her desperation must have come through in her voice because her friends left soon afterwards. Steven had stayed behind and Anna suddenly realized he had not said a word to her since the fire had started. Looking at him now, Anna knew he was angry. Unsure why and not knowing what to say to him, she walked over to the couch and sat down.

  "What is the matter with you?" he demanded. "They were only trying to help."

  "I don't need their help," Anna snapped again. She knew she was behaving badly but she couldn't seem to stop herself. She was so angry with herself and desperately wanted to be alone. She needed to think, needed to reassure herself that it wasn't her fault.

  Steven stalked over to her. "Maybe they needed to help you. Did you ever think of that? Good grief, Anna, those people are your friends."

  "I know that."

  "Then, what is the problem? You are acting strange."

  "I'm not acting strange. I just want to be alone."

  He looked at her in disbelief. "You want to be alone? You practically burn down the place and now you just want to be alone? What about me? What about your friends?"

  Anna had turned pale at his words. They tore at her heart and she whispered, "You think I did this on purpose?"

  "Of course not," Steven said impatiently.

  "You don't think it was my fault?"

  "No, it wasn't your fault. Although," he continued after a pause, "did you ever get that oven checked?"

  "No," she mumbled.

  "Anna, why not? You knew something was wrong with it. I thought you were more responsible than that."

  The words, so like the ones she had heard before, triggered her anger. She jumped from the couch and shouted, "Don't yell at me! Just get out! I don't want to see you anymore."

  Turning to walk away from him, Anna was shocked when he grabbed her from behind. He turned her around to face him and Anna shivered at the anger in his eyes.

  "What the hell is the matter with you?" he asked through gritted teeth.

  Fear raced through Anna. It was suddenly too much for her to handle. She tried to pull away but Steven wouldn't let her go. He started to shake her when she panicked. She closed her eyes and whispered, "Don't hit me, please, don't hit me."

  She was immediately released. She opened her eyes to see Steven staring at her in shock. The anger was still in his eyes but he was watching her with an appalled look on his face.

  "Hit you?" he questioned in disbelief. "Why would you ever think that I would hit you?"

  "My father..." Anna began before she realized what she was saying. She had never told anyone about her father. She had read all the books and knew that her father's problem had nothing to do with her but like many children from abusive homes she was unable to completely shed the guilt.

  A light dawned in Steven's eyes. "Your father beat you?"

  "Not me," Anna said quickly. "My mother."

  The anger returned to his face and Anna took a step back. Shaking his head he began pacing the room. She watched him for several minutes until he stopped and looked at her.

  "How dare you," he said, the anger lacing his voice. "How dare you compare me to him! I would never hurt you, don't you know that? Don't you know how much I love you?"

  Anna just stared at him. What could she say? She had been afraid he was going to hurt her. He waited for her to say something but Anna did not know what to say. She stood silently knowing she was destroying everything she had ever hoped for but unable to do anything else.

  "Anna, do you really think I would hit you?" he finally asked breaking the silence. Anna turned to see him staring at her. She did not say a word. "You actually think I would."

  Steven shook his head again and then said to her, "How long have you thought this? Is it just me or do you
think everyone is going to hurt you?"

  Anna couldn't answer him. She looked at the floor and refused to meet his eyes.

  "Anna, do you trust me?"

  She looked at him then. Looking into his eyes, she wanted to shout yes but years of fear kept her from speaking. The silence grew tearing them further apart.

  "When you decide on an answer, let me know." He turned and started to walk away.

  Anna's heart protested and a sound came from her mouth but she could not speak. Steven turned and stared at her a moment before stalking to the door and slamming it behind him.

  Anna thoughts returned to the present as she finished wiping the counter tops. She looked around the kitchen and knew she had done all she could for the moment. Making a mental note to replace the ruined curtains with less flammable mini blinds, Anna left the kitchen. With a heavy heart, she walked slowly into the bedroom. It was going to be a long night. She felt the tears forming in her eyes as she collapsed onto the bed.

  #

  His rage carried him out of the door, down the stairs and past his car. Steven walked without any conscious thought of where he was going. He was so angry he concentrated on simply putting one foot in front of the other. He walked for about twenty minutes before he felt his anger begin to cool.

  He found himself in front of his parents' home. Steven stood staring at the house that had been his home for eighteen years. He thought about all the love that he had known in that house. Slowly, the anger faded and he was left with a deep feeling of sadness.

  Anna had never known that kind of love. She didn't have the security of two parents who loved her and loved each other. She did not have the kind of example of a happy marriage that Steven had taken for granted.

  The light was on in his father's workshop and Steven stared at it. Dan often spent a few hours in the shop making furniture. He was a carpenter by trade and most of his work was on houses or business buildings but Dan's true love was in shaping the wood into beautiful pieces of furniture. He often sold his pieces and the extra money had come in handy when Steven and his siblings were younger.